Valtteri Bottas Reveals 2018 Mental Health Crisis and Near-Retirement Over Controversial Mercedes Support Role
Valtteri Bottas reveals he nearly retired in 2018 due to depression and team orders at Mercedes. Now leading Cadillac, he reflects on his mental health journey.
By: AXL Media
Published: Apr 30, 2026, 11:20 AM EDT
Source: Information for this report was sourced from PlanetF1

The Psychological Burden of Team Orders
Valtteri Bottas has provided a candid reflection on the emotional trauma he experienced while serving as a secondary driver at Mercedes, a role that nearly extinguished his passion for racing. Speaking on his career trajectory, Bottas revealed that the 2018 season was a breaking point, as he transitioned from a self-assured title contender to a tactical tool for the team's championship ambitions. According to Bottas, the recurring directive to "let Lewis through" was not merely a strategic choice but a fundamental challenge to his identity as a competitor. This dynamic reached a nadir at the 2018 Russian Grand Prix, where the famous "Valtteri, it's James" radio call forced him to surrender a race victory to his teammate.
A Winter of Despair and Contemplated Retirement
The weight of the 2018 campaign, in which Bottas failed to secure a single victory despite having the machinery to do so, led to a period of profound clinical exhaustion. Bottas admitted that by the winter break preceding the 2019 season, he was suffering from depression and had mentally committed to retiring from Formula 1. The Finn described a state of self-loathing fueled by negative social media discourse and the internal conflict of being a "good teammate" at the expense of his own professional legacy. During this hiatus, he questioned the years of family sacrifices and the personal cost of a career that had left him feeling like a subservient "wingman" rather than a champion.
The Epiphany That Saved a Career
A transformative moment of clarity occurred during a period of isolation in the Finnish woods, where Bottas shifted his focus from past regrets to future possibilities. He realized that he had been trapped in a cycle of "what if" scenarios regarding his lost opportunities at Mercedes. By deciding to return with the mindset of being the best driver on the grid, Bottas effectively rebranded himself for the 2019 season. This psychological reset was famously punctuated by his dominant victory at the 2019 Australian Grand Prix, after which he delivered a blunt message to his critics over the team radio. According to Bottas, that outburst was a necessary release of tension and a declaration of his renewed independence.
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