Enduring Devotion in Kakamega as Saleh Kalabarter Defies Traditional Norms to Care for Ailing Wife for Three Decades

Saleh Kalabarter defies traditional norms in Kakamega, cooking and cleaning for his wife Anna Ekali for three decades following her cancer diagnosis.

By: AXL Media

Published: Apr 1, 2026, 9:10 AM EDT

Source: The information in this article was sourced from TUKO.co.ke

A Lifetime of Shared Struggle and Street Resilience

The narrative of Saleh Kalabarter and Anna Ekali is one of profound survival that predates their current medical crisis. Now aged 65, Kalabarter met his future wife in the late 1960s when both were teenagers navigating the unforgiving streets of Kakamega Town. Ekali’s early life was marked by abandonment after her mother relocated from Turkana to Kakamega, leaving her in the care of a grandmother. Similarly, Kalabarter arrived in the region by chance after stowing away on a construction lorry from Lodwar. This shared background of displacement forged a bond that has sustained the couple through nearly 50 years of marriage, transforming a chance encounter into a lifelong partnership defined by mutual reliance.

Defying Cultural Expectations Through Domestic Service

For more than 30 years, Kalabarter has intentionally stepped outside the traditional roles typically assigned to men in rural Kenyan society. Following the onset of his wife's debilitating illness, he assumed full responsibility for cooking, cleaning, laundry, and general household management. This transition was not merely a matter of convenience but a necessity born of love, as Ekali’s physical strength deteriorated to the point where she could no longer perform basic tasks. By embracing these chores, Kalabarter has challenged local African norms, proving that the commitment of marriage transcends cultural archetypes when faced with the reality of a partner’s suffering.

The Weight of a Dual Medical and Financial Crisis

The couple’s stability was permanently altered approximately 20 years into their marriage when they sought medical intervention for infertility. The results of those clinical visits were devastating, revealing not only that Ekali could not conceive but that she was battling breast cancer. The diagnosis forced Kalabarter to make a difficult strategic choice, leading him to abandon his burgeoning business at a local butchery to become a full time caregiver. This shift pushed the family into a precarious financial position, as they moved into a temporary residence on government owned land in the Majengo area. The loss of a steady income has left them dependent on the sporadic generosity of the community to fund essential medications and basic nutritional needs.